Essay

EXPRESSING AFFECTION IN CHINESE CULTURE

Maria de Lurdes Marques*

§1. INTRODUCTION

What distinguishes us from one another? What unites us and brings us closer together when mere geographical distance cannot account for our differences? These are complex questions to which there is no simple answer, but it is essential to identify and understand our differences if we wish to understand one another. This task is greatly facilitated if we seek input from various scientific disciplines, rather than restricting ourselves to our own field of expertise.

Psychoanalysis is a working tool that can complement, and be complemented by other disciplines (anthropology, ethnology, psychology, philosophy, sociology, linguistics, etc.). Psychoanalytic anthropology, for example, enables us to take a broader look at the questions mentioned above, as we go from the unconscious to what is expressed and lived, in search of the genesis and the structure, while organizing the expression of thought, feeling and action. An instrument that is as rich and promising as it is flexible, psychoanalytic anthropology risks becoming fragile if we stray from our standard approach and give in to the temptation of wild interpretations. The solution to this may lie in the development of a new psychoanalysis.

Human beings are biologically similar to one another and have common psychological characteristics. Whatever their culture, they also share certain needs. These are expressed in behaviours and attitudes that can be interpreted without the risk of distorting their meaning. Certain inherited behaviours that are present in the unconscious are called 'archetypes', whereas cultural variants -behaviours shaped by culture - are considered 'cultural bound'. The analysis of these behaviours and these attitudes also reveals a biological, psychological and social complexity that is naturally not completely accessible.

§2. CULTURAL DETERMINANTS IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE INDIVIDUAL/ HUMAN DETERMINANTS IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF CULTURE

2.1. CULTURE, SOCIETY AND PERSONALITY

Culture and society are contexts within which human beings are patterned, and organize and express themselves; human beings who have lived and loved; who have a particular personality; who can only be understood within this dynamic system of references. In patterning the growing being, culture supplies the standards of behaviour, but there is more to it.

From a psychoanalytical point of view, culture can also be seen as the supplier of models of conduct that contain the structuring defence mechanisms capable of preserving the integrity of the ego. Culture thus generates a sense of belonging among the members of a society because they identify with the same complex standard system of responses, which they all have in common. This system will undergo changes and show particularities that are introduced by time, the moment and the dynamics inherent to the object of the culture itself.

PREVIOUS PAGE: Submissão (Submission) CINDY NG SIO IENG 吴少英 1995. Sgraffito on acrilic gesso engraving. 21.2 cm x 29.4 cm.

Culture can thus be viewed as an ontogenetic process, and any deviation would be an expression of inadequacy (which may lead to change) or of an inability to face a reality encumbered with codes (which may signify illness). This inability, which results from an organic deficit, from an ego that did not organize (enculturate) itself, or from an environment in which the references and stimuli that promote development were not properly transmitted, may lead to illness.

A behaviour that is desired and expected is naturally easier to develop and learn than one that is rejected, as it is promoted through a mechanism of positive or negative reinforcement. This normative action exerts the pressure that discourages deviant behaviour. Behaviours that are recommended and desirable iare promoted, and the people who adopt them are rewarded. Both society and people are reassured when behaviours are easily recognized and therefore anticipated.

The preparation of the adult for a particular social role depends upon the recognized and previously standardized existence of that role in the society. This is how societies are built and function, and how cultural patterns develop: 'When in Rome, do as the Romans do'. Such 'standardization' does not prevent infinite individual variation, which gives way to an aggregate of unique people capable of sharing a sense of belonging, values, references, projects and the meaning of their experiences.

Culture is, on the one hand, the individual's vital context and, on the other, the object of successive modifications realized by individuals, not as a singular entity, but as an active element, as a group responsible for the generation and expansion of ideas, ideologies, and vogues and models that sometimes imply ideas. These abstractions, developed by the members of the society to promote a superego model, are ambivalences of a social reality that, in conjunction with the id, establishes a permanent power struggle from which emerges an ego, a preferentially relational entity.

Culture reflects the context that shapes us, but it is also a product of the individual. As individuals, people are rarely important to the life and the functioning of the society to which they belong, and to the culture that identifies them. However, they are at the root of all social and cultural phenomena, through the expression of their needs and abilities (potentialities).

As simple units in the fabric of society, individuals have a general tendency to perpetuate their status - this is a means of defence -but as unsatisfied individuals, they may contribute to change. In doing so, they become agents of preservation, destruction, construction and transmission, and in this movement of enculturation they share in a close way a particular habitat with 'others', who in turn represent other models. In this process, change is self-motivated and based on the need (primary/ secondary) of the individual, which motivates and nurtures the desire for something else (motivation), generating movement towards change, and behaviour differs in the search for new solutions to old problems.

Societies share common characteristics that make research and extrapolation possible in the study of culture/society/personality. All research on society and culture starts with the individual, and all conclusions lead to the individual. The 'universality' of the codes, values and ethics -their durability when they outlast the individual - is evident in every society. These elements are functional and operational units that give society full autonomy, but at the level of the individual there is an 'internal differentiation' that creates diversity.

2.2. PERSONALITY AND CULTURE

Personality is a relatively recent subject of study, and proposed definitions remain complex, often depending on the purpose for which they are to be used and on the person using them. Taking this into account, it is possible to view personality as the expression of organized feeling, of a set of processes and psychological states that identify each person's individuality.

This definition is by no means perfect, but it serves as a point of reference that enables us to perceive personality as being the structure that is organized over the course of our lives and determines the way we act and feel in a particular context. Behaviour thus becomes the action we take or the attitude we adopt, both useful and economic, with respect to needs, taking into account life's demands.

The most diverse schools of thought and scientific fields have furthered the study of the structure of personality. The biological argument, which has varied in popularity throughout the history of science, is acquiring real value today, when one considers that innate factors, which are biologically determined, do not fully explain the diversity of personality as a whole or of the responses that occur in a personality that has a particular individuality.

One of the fundamental pillars in the development of individual personality and of the common traits that are observed in the collective whole as an ethnic group is the environment, which supplies the models and the full range of stimuli that characterize it. In order to trace the profile of a predominant personality in a particular community, which is in itself a profoundly dynamic phenomenon, it is necessary to interpret it always in that cultural/social context.

Individuality signifies the presence of an infinite number of peculiarities that make it possible to develop a temperament, the character that renders each person unique. The importance of the identity that constitutes each person within a particular social group becomes more noticeable when the individual moves and is confronted with cultural differences. In such a context, noticeably complex exchanges occur. The defence mechanisms act to ensure preservation, and the information from different codes will be tendentiously interpreted within the original references.

Efforts to evaluate and quantify personality, and to establish its dimensions have been fraught with difficulty with respect to the choice of measuring instruments and the analysis of information, apart from being inevitably limited in their ability to provide precise and accurate data on human behaviour in its many forms. Psychology has made the most progress in the sense that it enables us to make a certain comparison of personality profiles in various cultures. Tests have also been developed for outlining cross sections in a partial and selective manner.

Another method used in the study of personality is the comparative study of the life histories of individuals as products and originators of the culture in question. Culture and personality are two dynamics that are profoundly intertwined.

2.3. REMEMBERING WHAT WAS FORGOTTEN

As people grow and mature, interpersonal relations, replete with feeling and emotion, are of vital importance. This may be better understood within the context of the interplay between desire, anguish, pleasure/displeasure and the knowledge that one has been condemned to death with a suspended sentence.

We search relentlessly for someone who will fulfill, reinforce and strengthen us, and the more that person responds to our most pressing needs, the more noticeable the strength of the relationship. Poets speak of the anguish felt in the absence of a beloved one: "Say, is not absence death to those who love?" (Alexandre Pope, Autumn).

It is also through interpersonal relations that human beings acquire, develop, feel and create what those relations (with mother/father/family/ friend/others) progressively helped to structure, in conjunction with the complex psychomotor development, giving them a greater ability to pattern instinct on reality (reality principle/pleasure principle). Interpersonal relations, no matter how simple they are, cannot occur without a standard, a model that identifies them to everyone. Children who witness the relationships will interiorize it (by means of adaptive processes) through the signs, movements, symbols, attitudes and gestures they observe, and their meaning, so that later they can identify and repeat them with their own personal touch. They interiorize what they see and perceive, but always as it is experienced and felt by each person. Their desires will be progressively satisfied within the limits of reality, but they always strive to preserve their internal reality and its needs.

The child grows by repeating parts of the interaction model that it learns as it searches for pleasure and satisfaction while avoiding displeasure. Socialization, on the other hand, is a continuous and dynamic process of (un) culturation [aquisition of culture]. The mother/father also learned the interaction model in the cultural/educational context in which they were raised - what Freud called "the burden of culture."

The fact that human beings develop into adults extremely slowly (one of the slowest rates of development of all the species on earth) is of great importance because a wide range of influences, stimuli and interaction supplied by the environment are thus prolonged. This long period of influence and parental care, in a situation of great dependence, results in an individual, complex, unique and structured being that has its own identity but remains incomplete.

According to Bolk, the existence of an endocrine system with hormones that delay physical maturation is attributable to the slow development of humans. The soma (body) and the gene (structures responsible for procreation) develop at a different rate than the psyche. Because of this, human beings go from an excessively long childhood to a period of puberty in which their bodies are sexually equipped for procreation, but emotionally they are not ready for amorous genital relations. Sexuality (libidinal drive) is one of those instinctive drives whose importance has been clarified by psychoanalysis. The physical sensorimotor systems that trigger libidinal feelings emerge precociously at the level of the biologically mature body, which is inhabited by a being who is still immature with respect to its individuality, autonomy and gender identity.

Only in adulthood is that impulse, then predominantly genital, consummated in sexual relations, but there is more to it. This justifies in part the appearance of the Oedipus complex in the structuring of the object relation (in the psychoanalytical sense of the term). Emotional immaturity would contribute to the traumatic nature of infantile sexual fantasies because the child thinks that what it imagines is what sexual relations are supposed to be. Defence mechanisms play a role by containing a disorganized sexual instinct in an infantile being who is dependent, impotent and psychologically immature.

The corresponding socialization and learning that occur are vital to the progressive acquisition of skills for controlling the instinctual energy that, rather than being lost, goes on to be invested in objects that become more and more realistic (reality principle) and gratifying with respect to the needs of the growing being. It is the body, the source of pleasure (when satisfied) and displeasure (when unsatisfied), that becomes conscious and self-aware, and has experiences. In the eternal search for pleasure and flight from displeasure, desire is organized when space and time are allocated to it. When the characters in the scene (parental and other figures) play their well-defined and unequivocal roles, they continuously supply the patterns of conduct that they inherited from their own culture.

Little by little the primary process is abandoned in favour of the secondary process that gives the individual the necessary instruments to deal with the rules, norms, principles and codes (superego) while keeping the id alive. The repression of impulsive drives (narcissistic, libidinal and aggressive) does not imply their death; on the contrary, they are reinvested in constructive objects that structure personality.

A control of the libidinal drive (secondary process) is therefore required for self-preservation. The strength of the need for affection creates the sense of belonging that triggers the ability to integrate and favours the various forms of socialization: a) marriage - restored dual need; b) friendship -need of others. Sociability may therefore be viewed as a response to the irreparable trauma of the separation experienced at birth.

The neurotic conflict, the touchstone in the organization of the ego, is permanent and plays an adaptive role. To identify, understand and manage it is a form of equilibrium. Therapy forces the ego to become autonomous in relation to the superego, like a new acculturation, but in a more economic way from the point of view of emotional economy.

And if extrapolation is allowed, it can be said that cultures are the product of the specific traumas that occurred in a particular environment. Psychoanalytic anthropology endeavours to understand the development of the id, the ego and the superego, as well as that of the defence mechanisms that are more prevalent in a given culture and are transmitted more frequently.

From an ethnopsychiatric perspective, we must always try to understand the development of the individual as a reflection of the long interaction between the exogenous stimuli, the organic determinants and the way their synthesis is processed at the level of the ego. This linear, but extremely rich, dynamism that occurs in the phylogenetic and ontogenetic process around which a society's culture is embodied was the great discovery of psychoanalytic anthropology - what Freud called "the inhibition of the primitive. "Taking all this into account, in trying to understand those who are different from us, the individual, society and culture must all be considered.

§3. THE CONFUCIAN/DAOIST PARADIGM AND THE CHARACTER OF THE CHINESE

The world's largest ethnic group (Han), to which the majority of Chinese belong, is far from homogeneous. To be able to understand some of its more notable psychological traits, it is essential to be aware of certain aspects of Chinese culture such as the philosophy of Confucius (°551-†479 BC) and Daoism.

Generally speaking, Confucian ideology can be understood as a complex and rich doctrine that dates back to the fifth century. Originally consisting of seventy-two disciplines, it defended a particular view of the world, promoted social ethics, had a political vision, and became a lasting educational tradition. Regarded sometimes as a philosophy and sometimes as a religion without an organized structure as such, or even a humanistic movement, it had a profound impact on educational models, models for government and society, and even the family dynamics of numerous generations in China and elsewhere in Eastern and Southern Asia (Japan, Korea, Taiwan, Singapore).

Jesus was not the founder of Christianity, and Buddha was not the founder of Buddhism; rather, they taught in a particular historical context and borrowed teachings from other sources. similarly, it was from King Zhou Wen (second half of the eleventh century BC), the founder of the feudal ritual system, that Confucius (551-479 BC) received the teachings essential to the consolidation of his own thought.

The system was based on blood ties, marital alliances, ancient social customs and any new contracts entered upon, which created a complex system of dependence. It supported cultural values and social norms to ensure order in the State and the family, reinforcing the influence of Authorities as universal leaders, who had a Celestial mandate and were invested with religious and ethical power. Social solidarity would therefore be achieved through ritual observance rather than being imposed by law. Confucius was profoundly inspired by this philosophical legacy, and although he did not realize his political dreams, his concepts became very influential among the generations that followed, allowing his numerous followers to structure and enrich his Doctrine.

Of particular significance was the progressive movement that occurred when the Confucian concept of cosmology began to be applied to the development of morality. In Confucian metaphysics, humanity, as the preferred receptacle of celestial forces, is itself the centre of cosmic creativity. The followers of Confucius speak of qi 气('vital energy') which is comparable to the idea of the laws of nature as forms of the universal expression of forces responsible for human phenomena and which humanity must take into account in order to manage conflict well.

Heaven is our father and Earth our mother, and even a being as small as the individual has a place somewhere in the cosmos. For this reason, that which occupies the universe is represented in the body, and that which guides the universe is projected in the organism. We are all brothers and sisters, and all things are our companions. "Self-education requires humility, and increased wisdom requires knowledge of things." This theme of mutuality between heaven and human beings, blood ties between people, and harmony between people and nature, led to a concept of humanity as forming one body with all things.

The intelligentsia in modem China still maintain a certain continuity with Confucian tradition at all levels of daily life - behaviour, attitudes, beliefs, relationships, fears, projects and desires, although this is not widely acknowledged and is sometimes even denied. Confucianism is still an integral part of the psychocultural construction of Chinese society, whatever the milieu (intellectual, rural).

Certain values that are still present in today's society - paternalistic government, an educational system based on memorization and competition, the notion of family that emphasizes loyalty and cooperation - were naturally adapted in response to change, which openness implies in part. Modem scholars in continental China are now considering the possibility of a favourable interaction between Confucian humanism and democratic liberalism in a socialist context.

The Confucianist notion of human beings has a social orientation in which the main objective is to achieve harmony with things and with 'others' (society, family, group, nature). To achieve such harmony, it is essential for each individual, as a person, to behave as part of a whole, rather than as an isolated element. As a result, the notions of personality and individuality do not make much sense when viewed as unique and isolated entities; they must be seen as existing in relation to each other and to other things. It is as if we, as autonomous entities, did not possess our own existence, and society - the humanizing agent - was the supreme law of our existence. The only situation in which the person is dealt with as an individual entity is when judging acts of good or evil and ascertaining who is responsible for those acts. It is up to the authority that judges and attributes responsibility to reward or punish accordingly; there is not a very clear notion of the importance of the context or of any extenuating circumstances.

Confucian individualism signifies the maximization of the development of the individual, not for the purpose of self-expression, but so the individual may fully meet society's expectations. In case of conflict between the individual and the group (family, work, society), self-sacrifice is expected, for the sake of the integrity of the collective ego. The family is the primary, and most important, vehicle for the interiorization of this attitude, through its intense interaction during the child's development. One of the main consequences of this is a sense of belonging to an ethnic group and, above all, to a family.

In Confucian teaching, the family is the paradigm of all models of social organization and, as such, can meet all the needs of the individual. Confucius defined five cardinal types of relations: between sovereign and subject, father and son, elder and younger brothers, husband and wife, and friends. Three of these are found within the family, and the others are of a familial nature.

In such a relational context, the individual assumes a role that is defined in li 理(the great relational code of conduct) a role that must be honoured. The relation is not symmetrical, and power is clearly defined. One of the most notable aspects of the code is the emphasis placed on filial love and paternal authority. Some people even claim that this was the ideological basis of traditional Chinese society. Filial relations are not limited to those between parent and child; age and closeness contribute to the filial nature of other relations (age, generation, family relation, etc.).

Intrinsic to the notion of authority are knowledge, wisdom and experience, which is used not only in the choice of an academic field and in the resolution of conflicts, but also when asking for advice and protection. Once again, and always in the name of harmony, li (principle) orients and clarifies.

Children are taught (between the ages of five and six) to respect hierarchies throughout a continuous and prolonged process of socialization. For this reason, they must not initiate conversation and only speak when spoken to: -"Listen before you speak!" A passive attitude is desired, promoted and expected.

In the education of the individual, an effort is made to contain the emotional expression of hostility or confrontation with respect to authority. Containment and control of expressiveness is one of the main characteristics of the educational message. It is believed that being overcome with passion will probably make one act impolitely and lead to mistakes, for one loses one's critical sense and ability to reason. In addition, one will be labelled an egoist.

Confucian thought is not so much one of conformity; it promotes harmony rather than uniformity. It also takes into consideration rebellion against a tyrannical leader. For certain authors, this form of conformity is more of an adaptive mechanism of the cultural code than an interiorized value, which allows the individual to develop a harmonious relation with the outside world. Is it a formalistic conformity?

This 'ethnic' group has other characteristics that are important to understanding its profile:

- A sense of belonging (Chinatowns - they look for the same residential areas when they emigrate);

- Loyalty to a group (politicians, sects, a sacrifice different from that made by the Japanese);

- Predominance of the collective to the detriment of the individual;

- 'Face', an ancient notion that is extended to the family - 'A man needs face like a tree needs bark'.

When a member of the family does something wrong, the family also loses 'face'. Each person's 'face' is communal property. Even mistakes made by children are shared by the family. Mental deficiency and mental illness are considered a punishment for an ancestor's wrongdoing, so they must be hidden from society.

The primacy of hierarchy, the family as a primitive social reality, the primacy of all socialization for the attainment of harmony - these are aspects of a model that is continuously learned and interiorized in the building and life of the society at all levels (neighbourhood, school, factory, country). This dynamic has changed with industrialization, and the exodus to the major urban areas introduces important changes, but always within this context.

In the urban space and environment, relations are broadened. Friendship (one of the cardinal relationships) emerges as a fraternal relation (older brother), and friends may even be introduced as brothers or sisters. 'Friends are as close as brothers and sisters'. 'When at home, trust your parents; when away, trust your friends'.

Organized crime societies are highly hierarchical closed formations and have loyalty codes that reveal a family structure. Likewise, when one emigrates, an intermediary intercedes as an element of integration into the community. But, even then, the relationship is not symmetrical: 'jia' 家 means 'family' as well as 'clan'.

Speech, the ultimate expression of thought and feeling, is loaded with symbolism and extremely descriptive when referring to concrete things. There is a preoccupation with description rather than classification (synthetic thought/analytic thought). Sometimes the object and its qualities are fused (adjective/noun).

Words are the visualization of feeling with a very rich descriptive vocabulary that evokes what is concrete, so figurative writing becomes a stylized symbolic representation. One word can therefore represent only one image, and there is a large percentage of monosyllables with great phonetic mobility. The 'old' written Language is figurative, symbolic and stylized. The characters used to translate attitudes, movements or states combine different images to obtain the synthetic representation.

"The arrival of the wild birds signals the arrival of spring, at the moment when day turns into night."

"Man searches for woman when the ice is no longer melting."

chen - deep water

fen - simmering water

tchou**-salt water

Thought is not expressed by ideas but by images, so there is a need for concreteness. Sinologists emphasize the importance of concrete notions in thought and daily life. Ideas barely emerge, and when they do it is through images and the connection established between two or more images. There is also a noticeable lack of words representing abstract concepts. In poetry and literature dealing with abstract notions, the signifiers are obtained from philosophy.

Yin 阴 and yang 阳 are antithetical symbols with great power that originated in philosophy. They have been adapted through various forms of expression and given concrete attributes corresponding to the context in which they are used (medicine, poetry, philosophy, etc.).

Dao 道, the principle that regulates vital movement, is the means by which Heaven communicates with Earth, the rule for all morality, the order that reigns in the world and the source of power. Written material represents a close solidarity between natural order and social order, a symbiosis between the two worlds that is conveyed by the strength of rhythm, the power of verbs, graphic images, etc.

The notion of Dao surpasses the notions of strength and substance, whereas yin and yang, viewed indiscriminately as substances and genders, are used to classify and group the antithetical aspects of universal order. Dao, yin and yang are a synthetic evocation of, and a global appeal to, the rhythmic order that presides over life on earth and spiritual activity.

The Chinese attribute a figurative power to their emblems that is not distinguished from their effectiveness. Some emblems are supremely functional, which is clear proof that Chinese thought refuses to distinguish between what is logical and what is real. Even the quantifiable notions of time, space and number are full of abstraction, which means that two plus two does not always equal four.

Chinese thought seems to be heavily influenced by the ideas of order, totality and rhythm, taken in a general sense. These date back to the Han Dynasty, during which there was a scholasticism that concurrently developed an orthodox life discipline. Surprisingly enough, it retains a concrete, poetic and flexible attitude, as well as a sort of free play that is dissimulated and sometimes manipulative.

§4. THE DYNAMICS OF THE CHINESE FAMILY

Having a son is one of the most important factors of the Chinese family. The son will venerate his father, and the mother hopes he will be the future representative of the family. When a woman becomes pregnant, the family, and especially the mother, acquires a new status unobtainable otherwise.

The birth of a child is anxiously awaited evidence of the woman's fertility, since that of the man is never in doubt. When a woman becomes pregnant, it is customary for the couple to sleep apart. From the fourth month on, they receive privileges and considerable attention, and a number of things are forbidden (habits, foods, attitudes and taboos).

Sometimes, even the child's layette is prepared by others. If a girl is born, the rejection may be acknowledged or denied, whereas the birth of a boy is always celebrated in grand style. The superstitious feeling that it is possible to interfere in the choice of the baby's sex even leads to very diversified rituals and beliefs.

Economic considerations also play an important role in the desire for a son, which is not always easy to admit. A son may earn a certain income, whereas a daughter will have to be married-off quickly. For a woman, having a son means the possibility of acquiring the authority, power and prestige that were always denied her, when she becomes a mother-in-law. When a daughter marries, she must obey her husband's mother and live under her roof. However, if she gives birth to a boy, that may change slightly.

The only criteria surrounding the feeding of a newborn is the child's will and appetite; there is no set schedule or procedure. Children are breast-fed for more or less a year, and not always only by their mother. There is the notion that women should breast-feed until their menstrual cycle recommences, which may take years, and that boys benefit from a longer period of breast-feeding. When boys are weaned, they are given fortified nutritional supplements. Once the child starts taking solid food, breast-feeding may continue for a long time, even years, but between meals.

Maternal care is always evident, and the other women present (grandmother, aunt, neighbour, etc.) often play a maternal role, but boys are accorded more time and attention, and they are the subject of greater investment. Newborns are also often taken to work (fields, factory).

Children are fed by others; autonomy is not encouraged. Diapers are used not only because of their essential function, but also to immobilize the legs, and sometimes even the hands, as much as possible. It is believed that this will prevent children from becoming overly 'lazy'. Boys normally remain in diapers for one month, and girls just slightly longer. Immobilization and the restriction of movement help to interiorize the need for self-control. This need can be observed in the way people walk - monotonously with short steps - and in areas such as calligraphy, objects of art and their miniaturization, etc. The posture adopted in social situations to show respect for authority also reflects self-control: the person sits on the edge of the chair with the upper body erect and well aligned, knees together and hands on the knees.

Education is structured to prohibit and contain desire, and discipline thought. The children have few toys (the supply is limited, as is buying power), with few moving parts, and fantasy, if there is any, must have a utilitarian function.

Physiological needs are not really disciplined. Children defecate and urinate where and when they wish. The products of the body (urine and faeces) are not considered repugnant. Hygiene is less rigorous, and bathing takes place only when it is considered necessary. Unlike in the West, potties are not used because children are not able to understand [sic], and the Chinese feel that such acts do not need to be controlled. However, it is up to the mother to anticipate the moment.

Children sleep with their parents for a long time and then move into their grandmother's bed or that of another family member. When they reach the age of five, they start being treated as persons capable of understanding, so that they can begin to learn to be with adults. A greater investment is thus made in their education, which is often brusque, going from an attitude of absolute tolerance and permissiveness to an extremely demanding one: concealment of the body, control of appetites and desires, permanent obligations to others, unconditional obedience to parents and parental figures, containment of emotional expression.

In the latency phase, the child, who belongs to the family as well as past and future generations, may display poorly managed aggressive behaviour and soon after become an adolescent whodoes not touch anything and is highly stimulated to obey. This form of containment turns the investment and attention inwards, towards the person, and the body and its functioning. This inward 'look' is one of the main daily concerns of the Chinese individual.

Priority is given to educational subjects that can inculcate good social conduct and habits. The Chinese school system is demanding, severe and punitive. Although the family plays a protective role, it is a strong means of transmission that works in harmony with the school, becoming an extension of it.

Fathers establish a certain distance between themselves and their sons, and the latter only approach their fathers when requested to do so, without contesting them, and never looking them in the eye. Their relationship is marked by tension and denial of the hostilities and aggressiveness generated by the numerous restrictions and taboos. Filial obedience is structured, organized and ingrained, and later in life it is extended to other social figures of the parental imago.

A different attitude is taken towards girls. The family's main concern is to get her married, and this can become an obsession that causes anxiety on both sides. Her faults must be hidden and her virtues emphasized, to make her sufficiently attractive as a potential wife, mother and homemaker. Her education is of less concern. She may however have a closer and less restricted relationship with her father. He never administers corporal punishment; that is up to the mother.

The daughter's future spouse is chosen long before the wedding takes place. Matchmakers are called upon, the fathers hasten to work out the details of the trade, and the girl is expected to accept the proposal. The boy's mother must approve of the girl; no wedding takes place against her will. 'If she pleases my mother, she pleases me'.

'Girls are shy and their skin is finer'. The girl must appear modest, timid and submissive. This game of love is somewhat sadistic/masochistic. It may take a few days for the marriage to be consummated, and the girl's parents are often given a gift to celebrate the proof of her virginity.

The submissive attitude must be extended to the mother-in-law, and this clearly begins with the tea ceremony during the wedding ritual: the bride serves tea on her knees in front of her mother-in-law. As the couple's relationship evolves, the woman takes on a greater role, and the husband cultivates the distant attitude appropriate to someone in authority. When a child is born, the woman's main task is accomplished. Having a child is a way of dignifying the woman that secures her status. 'If you do not have children, people laugh at you'. 'If you do not have children, people pity you'.

As the man ages, he progressively removes himself from daily responsibilities, and assumes a passive and contemplative role. The elderly have an image of lethargic beatitude, which turns them into sages who are knowledgeable about life but not science. They are called upon during conflicts, problems and consultations that involve major family decisions. Erudition, which is diversified -morality, philosophy, ethics, etc. - is greatly appreciated and acknowledged in public.

In order to approach such a personage, one might have to call upon an intermediary, who always plays a role in business, marriages, exchanges or requests. The intermediary may be a family member or a friend who has become a cultural institution. This practice of turning to others for help in solving problems has led to various known phenomena: the association of immigration movements, the structure of sects, societies, the rental of housing, etc.

The erudite man, far removed from material needs, is often the hero of folk-tales. The dominant strong man, who has destructive, devastating power, does not normally fit the profile of the storybook hero. As for women, they are often personified in popular Literature as being perverse, dominating, vindictive and castrators (projective material). In linguistic terms, the feminine gender sometimes appears in ideograms to represent 'jealousy', 'disloyal' and 'perfidy'.

§5. CONCLUSION

The profile of the Chinese man is strongly marked by a number of traits: withholding of personal opinions; idealization of rest; little initiative; submission, especially to parental figures; and, most notably, dependence and passivity. These characteristics are very much present in cultural education, especially in early childhood. It is basically this phase that is actualized by the permissiveness, with considerable oral and corporal investment.

The mother is always present, and excessively so, either in her specific role or through the group and its maternal, gratifying and reassuring nature. During the child's development, the mother does not as a rule give it the space required to let its own desires evolve, which often leads to a passivereceptive position. Priority is given to oral satisfaction as the source of strength, health and balance.

Any move towards autonomy is discouraged or even prevented, which promotes the only movement possible: inwards, towards oneself and the past. The preferred defence mechanisms are regression and denial. Passivity is that which is not in conflict with intensive work habits, which may be observed especially among 'executive' women.

We may be witnessing an 'acting out' mechanism, such as pseudo-activity, where the person fantasizes about gaining power and a heritage. Among women, orality is associated with an activeoffensive attitude, with signs of an aggressiveness that is sometimes poorly contained. Throughout their lives, they are undervalued and experience all types of rejection in relation to men. There is also the feeling of ambivalence with regard to the birth of a daughter, which is always a risk. Marriage is the only possible option and the main ambition, one that is shared by the family. Any defect the girl may have is a painful threat to the prospects of marriage.

Some Chinese women are overly ambitious, desire power, are aggressive, and have a very competitive spirit and a great need for public recognition of their power. Such an attitude is attenuated upon the birth of a son. These women run a certain risk of becoming ambivalent, overly protective and dominating mothers. The narcissistic desire for reparation and the ego ideal work together to generate in women a utilitarian desire for a son as an extension of themselves, and when they become mothers-in-law they may then exercise the power they never had, with all the authority the culture allows.

For both men and women, meals are long, complicated and always taken in a group. Both sexes gamble in an obsessive, impassioned and compulsive manner, with complex rituals, the women holding on to the dream that one day luck will be on their side. Also to be noted is the behaviour with sado-masochistic characteristics of pregenital origin. The alienating behaviour consisting of the use of drugs and the sucking of substances that allow one to withdraw, rest and not think or feel is a means of escape through 'oral' fixation. In addition, the desire to control through magic (religion, fengshui, divinatory arts, etc.) translates the regressive movement to stages of dependence with respect to fate.

Obedience and filial submission with the creating of distance may be more than a mere cultural convention. It may be a means of preventing conflicts between generations, and containing Oedipal desire and the son's hostility towards his father. Tradition requires that men be self-made so that they will be venerated after their death, thus satisfying their desire for continuity. 'Twenty-four examples of filial obedience' is a set of important precepts for educating children properly in their obligations, duties and responsibilities, which are extended to the other members of the family, both past and present.

Translated from the Portuguese by: Paula Sousa

CHINESE GLOSSARY

Dao 道

feng shui 风水

jia 家

qi 气

Zhou Wen 周文

yin 阴

yang 阳

li 理

**These three romanised transliterations were supplied as such without their corresponding Chinese characters.

*Doctorate by the Faculdade de Medicina (Faculty of Medicine) of the Universidade do Porto (University of Oporto), Oporto. Specialized in Psychiatry at the Miguel Bombarda Hospital, in Lisbon. Practitioner at the Centro Hospitalar Conde de São Januário (Count of St. January Hospital) in Macao.

start p. 45
end p.